How to be Happy?
This is a question that interests us all but one which we do not have the ultimate answer to. In this article, we will try to explore the subject of happiness and try to find some answer to it.
What is happiness?
Happiness is a state of mind when we get what we want to. It could be money, power, relationships, physical beauty or a combination or all of the above.
We get happiness when we achieve milestones in life. Just think of the happiness you got when you got your last promotion or a new job, or when your kid brought in a good test score.
But while we get happiness when we achieve milestones, the harsh fact is that most of the times we fail at achieving or getting what we want. When we do that, we have to face the cousin of happiness which is unhappiness.
So, then what is the secret to being happy?
Is it to reduce our desires as we can’t have them all as our results many times are not in our own hands?
Yes, and no.
Yes, because if our desires are endless we will find ourselves running on a never stopping treadmill.
We will lose a lot of weight but we will die by exhaustion.
We will end up achieving a lot but we will never be contented.
No, because it is not possible to not at all have desires and still be happy. Exception would be the people who have achieved nirvana or self actualization and have given up on material things. I respect them a lot but normal people like you and me cannot follow them.
In fact, desire is the fuel that keeps our engine running.
How to be happy, then?
The secret in my view is to focus on processes than results. Focus on input more than output.
Our extra focus on output meanders us on our path of giving the right input.
This is the philosophy of the Bhagwat Geeta of focusing on Karma or action, and not worry about the results.
Is Money == Happiness?
That is a big and controversial question.
Let us look at some data.
Top 20 happiest nations [link] also feature in the top 30 wealthiest by per capita GDP [link] , barring 3 nations.
But the top 3 happiest nation- Finland, Denmark and Iceland do not feature in the top 10 wealthiest nations.
Which means there is a strong correlation between money and happiness.
But it is not the only factor, and too much money does not mean too much happiness.
While this is all true, these are all developed nations.
You do not decide if you are born in a developed or developing nation or even in a rich or a poor family.
But what you can decide is your outlook to life.
If money makes you happy, sure go for it.
But be aware of the pitfalls that may come along your way.
If being a successful corporate makes you happy, by all means give it a shot.
But be aware that your personal life and health are equally important.
If being around women gives you the adrenaline rush, go for that boost.
But remember, lasting happiness is in a single and stable relationship.
The fact is that happiness is a bit like experience — we come to know the real meaning of it when we have done everything we could to get it and by the time we understand it, we have grown too old :)
But i guess the fun part is the journey rather than the destination.
I am unhappy now, what to do to turn it around?
For starters, think and make a list of what makes you happy.
Then make a list of what is it you should do to get ahead in life. See where is the match in the two. Then work on it to become an expert or to get perfection in that field.
It could be that you are not doing what you like to earn your livelihood.
Sure, no worries, you can always do it as a hobby or a side gig.
Be happy.
No one else cares if you are sad.
So you might as well be happy.
